Don’t Worry, The Giant Hustler Hollywood Adult Store Sign Was Untouched

Touchdown Jesus, aka the King of Kings statue, burned in spectacular fashion yesterday after being set ablaze by a lightning strike (via mistermix). The massive Touchdown Jesus statue was built on a metal frame out of Styrofoam with a thin veneer of fiberglass and has been a famous landmark along I-75 near Monroe, OH (just outside my “hometown” of Dayton). Here’s a picture of the statue before the FSM smote it in His Great Wisdom:

Last night, sometime between 11pm and midnight, the FSM decided He had tolerated the idol for long enough, and struck it down with a blast of lightning.

Thankfully, no one was injured in the blaze, though the damages to the statue and surrounding structures at the church were estimated at $700K. All that was left of the statue itself was the steel frame. Don’t worry, though, the giant Hustler Hollywood sign just across the road was completely undamaged in the blaze.

“It sent goosebumps through my whole body because I am a believer,” said Levi Walsh, 29. “Of all the things that could have been struck, I just think that that would be protected. … It’s something that’s not supposed to happen, Jesus burning,” he said. “I had to see it with my own eyes.”

“I can’t believe Jesus was struck,” said his brother, who noted the giant Hustler Hollywood sign for the adult store across the street was untouched. “It’s the last thing I expected to happen.”